
DOGS = “EMOTIONAL NINJAS”
Most of my clients are surprised to learn that dogs aren’t particularly “smart,” at least as far as cognitive intelligence goes. Numerous studies have found dogs to be relatively bad at independent problem-solving, as compared to other domesticated animals and social hunters, like cats, horses, dolphins, chimpanzees, and even pigeons. Dogs score even lower when the puzzles involve objects; quickly looking to the human handlers for a solution (as compared to wolves, for example, who will continually try to figure it out on their own).
What seems to really set dogs apart is their emotional intelligence and social cognition. Modern scientific studies are beginning to reveal some amazing facts behind the special bond between humans and dogs. For example, we now know that dogs mimic physiological aspects of their owners’ personality and emotional centers, such as matching heart rates; hormonal secretions, and often, even mirroring other health conditions generally. Amazingly, neuroscientists have even discovered that when dogs and humans gaze into each other’s eyes, the brains of both parties secrete the hormone oxytocin (a/k/a “the love hormone”), which has been linked to strengthening the emotional bond between mother and infant.
On the one hand, dogs’ unique ability to tap into the “parent-child bond” centers of our brain (on an inter-special level, no less!) is certainly what makes them so special to us. Put simply, it enables them to provide us with the kind of love and affection that we humans crave.
On the other hand, it also empowers them to hijack those nurturing, self-sacrificing instincts, for their own benefit. In short, your dog is an “emotional ninja.” Giving you those “big puppy-dog eyes” (to get what she wants) is her most important survival skill.
This all makes a lot of sense when you consider that historically, the better a dog was at reading our intentions, deciphering our vocal commands, and responding (correctly) to our gestures, the more valuable she became to us, as a useful hunting partner, a guard for our family/land/livestock, and a personal companion. Conversely, the better a human was at providing security, stability, and reward, in return for the dog’s behavioral compliance, the more likely that he was to gain a useful (and loving) companion.
Establishing this kind of healthy dominance –a synergistic relationship based in mutual trust, respect, and service – is the key to achieving that “perfect dog experience” most of us wish for. Once you have an ever-ready, willing companion, patiently awaiting your next instruction, faithfully and happily by your side – there is nothing like it. (It’s almost like having a spiritual twin here on earth.)
Our “Fur Babies” truly fill something deep within us, often in a way others never could. Perhaps that’s why we see substantial health benefits associated with dog ownership, including lower rates of various inflammatory conditions, like heart attack; heart disease; high blood pressure/cholesterol; diabetes; allergies; and asthma. (Not to mention a slew of mental health conditions like anxiety, depression, and addiction, to boot!)
Unfortunately, there are no short-cuts to achieving such bliss. In nature, the pack mother gives 100% of her attention and effort to prepare her pups with every possible skill necessary to further their individual survival and success. (She also gets plenty of communal assistance from the other “aunties” too, of course.) Conditioning a living mind is an organic, daily, constant process; there are no gimmicks or silver bullets. The truer you are to that process, the sooner everything will begin trickling down from there.
A simple shift in the handler’s intention can make all the difference. Start by recognizing unwanted behaviors as an opportunity for you to teach your dog the right behavior, rather than as misbehaviors. Remember also that you cannot blame her for “being a bad dog” if you have not given her adequate opportunities to learn how to be a good one first.
Lastly, keep in mind that knowing what someone doesn’t want you to do is not the same thing as knowing what they do want you to do. And saying “No” is not the same thing as teaching!